Super Boo Returns!

Remember Super Boo?

I don't know about you but that seems like ages ago.  Looks like the folder holding the pictures was created in March, but they had to be taken before that.  We haven't lived in that house since February. 

I feel like its been years, though.  It was before my conditioning starting going down hill.  Before the anemia diagnosis.  Before I threw my hands up and got depressed.  Before the treatment and road to recovery.

Super Boo doesn't quite look like this any more...

...but she's working on it.

This weekend will be my first triathlon ever.  I signed up for one back in May, but 2 weeks before the race I was ordered by my doctor not to run.

Congestive heart failure.  That's what she told me could happen if I continued to push myself.

And I considered ignoring her advice and doing the triathlon any way. 

Was I really that stupid?

Thanks to the advice and support of my bloggy friends, I held off.  Several of you told me I deserved for my 1st tri experience to be worry free (health wise at least).  Better to worry about the hilly bike course or getting kicked during the swim than over taxing my heart.

Oh and the threat my sister gave me - the race was on the Little Man's birthday.  She promised that if something happened to me she'd tell him every year on his birthday that his Auntie Boo couldn't celebrate with him because her selfishness caused her to be dead/a vegetable. 

Okay then.

It was painful emotionally and I cried the whole weekend that was supposed to be my first every triathlon.  Over the next few months I dealt a little with depression, but the doctor figured me out, filled me up, and released me for training.

I wouldn't allow myself to get excited about it.  After all what if I relapsed?  Emotionally I knew I couldn't handle the disappointment again. 

Two weeks to go - I thought to myself  "Could this really be happening?"

A week out "This is really happening!"

Now its only 2 days away.  Sunday morning I'll rise early to swim 300 meters (in a heated outdoor pool - I'm assuming I'll freeze my buns off waiting for my turn to jump in).

Then I'll towel off and head for my huffy to complete the 8 miles of the hilly bike course.  I considered using a friend's bike, but since they are calling for rain on Sunday I'd prefer mine.  That way I don't have to worry about the rain hurting her expensive bike.

I'll dismount my bike and take off in a run for the last 3 miles of the race.

Okay by that time it will have warmed up and my shorts and tank will be more appropriate than a long sleeve tee and gloves.  Less than 2 hours after it all begins I'll be crossing the finish line (Lord willin if the creek don't rise.)

Doing my mock-tri yesterday (10 min swim, 10 min bike, 10 min run) I started thinking about all I've been through the past 6 months.  I started to cry as I bikes around the path.  I'm going to be a basket case on Sunday!!

The End.

For now - check back next week for the race report!

Trust in the Lord - Thankful Thursday

About a little over a month ago, my husband and I bought yet another piece of land.  Bringing our grand total up to 5 pieces of property.  Only one of which held a structure - the other 4 are empty pieces of land. 

I'll just tell you - that makes me nervous.  What good is an empty piece of property? 

As many of you know, Jay is a real estate agent and grew up with the knowledge that real estate is a great investment.  I grew up in a savings account and CDs kinda family.

This particular piece of land was a foreclosure going up for auction.  He would be attending the auction with a real estate buddy of his (aka "the boyfriend" I tease him that he talks to this buddy on the phone more than he did me when he and I were dating!).  Typically for auctions we agree on a certain amount he can spend - if the property goes for that or lower, he can buy it.  Otherwise he has to let it go.

To me, auctions are terribly dull.  Plus my objective $ figure means he doesn't get caught up in the excitement of the atmosphere.

We agreed that he wouldn't spend more than 10% of what the property sold for originally.  This land was in a high class development (home to several $1 million + homes) with double gated access and a community pavilion.

The thought of all this made me nervous.  After all the money in our bank account was for my much needed bathroom remodel.  Jay and I prayed about it, and I trusted that whatever happened would be for our best interest.

I had to trust God, and trust in my husband.  We had that money in the bank because he is darn good at his job. 

My mother and I were visiting my grandmother in the hospital when I got the call.

"We got it."

My heart sank.  I'd secretly been hoping that God would get me out of it by making it sell for too much money. 

My mom tried to reassure me - if I'd prayed about it then I had to trust that it was God's will for us to have it.   "Sure," I reasoned "but what if its God's will that we fall upon financial ruin so that we seek Him and discover our need for Him and Him alone?"

We closed on the land August 26th, and with that I lost my hopes of a claw foot tub and double sinks in my bathroom. 

This weekend, Jay received a call.  Someone was interested in purchasing the property from us.  His offer was less than we were hoping for, but such a quick sale meant no property tax bills or HOA fees out of our pocket.

I'm not being flippant when I say THANK GOD!  For so many things.  For a husband I can trust to use our money wisely.  For showing just a little patience and still getting my bathroom remodeled this fall.  For a God that is with me no matter what. 

Because even if the outcome would have been different, He is still sovereign.  He is still in control and working things for my good.

PS - My mothers reaction to the offer?  "Do the two of you poop gold?"

What are you thankful for this week?

a frienemy closer than a brother

Excuse me.

Yes you, my frienemy.

*clears throat and squirms nervously*

Its time you and I had a little chat.  This relationship we've got just isn't working for me any more.  I know most of its my fault.  You give - I take, then complain about how you got the job done.

Even how you looked while doing the job.

I really must apologize.  You've taken everything I can dish out - moodiness, illness, hard training.  You've even put up with my with my obsessive behaviors. 

Let's just face facts - I don't like you.  In fact most of the time I hate you.  I can't remember a time that you've been in my good graces.  Rather I put up with you, or else just all out can't stand to look at you. 

Here's the thing - I know you're not going any were.

And quite frankly I need you.

We have to find a way to coexist.  Have a relationships that thrives even.  I know it has to start with me.  You've never done anything wrong.

Well other than acquire too much fat.  If we're honest, we both know that's mostly my fault too.  If I didn't run out and get a burger more than I should you wouldn't have to find a place to store all that fat.

You're not without blame too though.  I could look like a normal human if you weren't so greedy.  Give the rest a shot at some fat.  Distribution really is the key to looking good.

Looking good isn't what's important though is it.  When I think of all the places we've been together, all the places you've taken me, I'm overwhelmed how something so hated could give me so much joy.

I deprived you of oxygen and forced you to walk 26.2 miles over steep terrain.  Did you give out on me, like so many along the way?  Did you make me dig out my phone to make the dreaded "I can't go a step further" call?

Not at all.  While I cursed you for not going faster, you just kept going.  Slow and steady, at the best pace you could handle.  You're stronger than me you know.  If someone talked to me the way I talk to you, I would have given up a long time ago.

Through the snow, climbing Rocky Top, you just took one step after another - finding good places to rest in the snow.  It would have been easy for you to lead me astray.  To guide me to a slick patch and watch me fall on my rear end.  That would have shown me.

But you didn't.  You stuck with me through thick and thin.  Even when thin wasn't quiet think enough.

So I stand sit before you hear today to ask for a truce.  You've been more than kind to me over the years.  I really am going to try and stop the abuse.  You deserve better.

In return I'm going to ask a few more things of you.  This weekend, I've got 300 m to swim, 8 miles to bike, and 3 miles to run (consecutively).  I wanna cross the finish line with you.  After that we're going to start training for a half marathon in November and the Disney marathon in January.

And I'll need you with me every step of the way.

Legs,

please forgive me.  For all the insults I've hurled your direction.  For all the bitter feelings I've felt toward you.  You really have been a good friend to me. 

Love,
the upper half you've carried around for the past 30 years.

True Confessions - Back from Vacation

My first confession?

I'm wearing white after Labor Day.

*Pauses for the collective gasp.*

Here's the thing - is September, its still 90 degrees out, and I wanna wear this sundress.  And the white short sleeved blazer is the only thing that makes it work appropriate.

Also, I'm not going to do a vacation synopsis post.

Jay's got most of the pictures posted on facebook and I didn't do much of anything besides this:

When we did venture away from the beach we had fun.  Be it thrift store shopping (because Jay didn't pack enough t-shirts) or playing with our food...

If you're not my friend on facebook and wanna be, just email me and I'll let you know how to find me.

I'm nervous about my triathlon but not worried...

I was super worried after reading a book on vacation that mentioned walking your bike is illegal and grounds for disqualification.  Christie O. assured me that she'd seen it plenty of times.  She then consulted the USA Triathlon rules which served as more reassurance.  If I'm walking my bike I have to get out of the way for those riding, but I can walk it if necessary.

Planning my marathon training gave me a high, although I am a bit intimidated by the number of workouts in the week.

Excluding the long run mileage, its nothing I haven't done before.  I just haven't gotten back at it full throttle and I'm a little nervous about it.

I got more mud out of my ear this morning.

Too bad Jay hasn't sent me the pictures to share.  After the mud run last Saturday it took 6 Q-tips (both ends) to get the mud out.  When I cleaned my ears out this morning I found more that had apparently been hiding. 

I get home Internet this morning!!

Jay is meeting them to install sometime before lunch.  We had been relying on his Verizon Internet card for service, but after 2 months of outrageous overages ($150 last month, $300 this month) we I called to get home serviced hooked up.

I could do a whole blog post about this one.  But I won't, cause I'd be whining and you don't wanna hear it.  I'll just say that if we can afford $300 Internet overages I can afford to put the a/c down to 78 when I'm cooking and hot.

I hope to eventually get a net book, but for the time being I'll probably use Jay's old laptop.  It works okay except he's a diva the power cord has to stay plugged in all the time.  Totally a reason to buy a brand new $700 replacement right.

Okay I'm going to end this post before I get bitchy and run off everyone with tales of how my husband has woken me up with stoopid talk radio MP3s at 4:30 AM two consecutive mornings and my patience is wearing thin due to exhaustion.

So - what do you have to confess this week??

Marine Corp Mud Run 5K Race Report

Twas the night before the mud run, and all through the home two creatures were stirring trying not to aimlessly roam.  But instead they had their sites set out with a goal, they'd find clothing that was old and worn - something they could get dirtier than coal.

Okay as badly as that sucked - it was hard to write so we're switching back to my rambling style 'kay?

Jay easily found an old muscle shirt of his that he no longer cared about, and a pair of almost too short shorts that had paint stains on them (how is it men's shorts keep getting longer and longer while women's shorts keep getting shorter??)  "No draw string?" I questioned but he insisted that he had chosen the right pair.

My mother gave me a pair of her shorts that she didn't want any more.  In my house you just don't throw clothing out - she was excited to hand them over because it meant she finally got to throw them away.  Not sure why she needed a reason, but I went with it.  They had a draw string, so I didn't care that they were a couple of sizes too big.

Jay hunted out an old tee of his from the box I consider rags, and doctored it up some. There was an empty spot, so he filled in my name.

He then added a special surprise.

Notice that scratched out part?  Apparently this tee had belonged to Aaron Barone before Jay rescued it from a thrift store.  A little blue sharpie and suddenly the shirt is mine again.  Along with a sweet little message.

We had about an hour drive, so we headed out early.
And were greeted by rain showers that weren't expected until later in the day.

The race hadn't even started and we were soaked.  There were some pansies that were wearing ponchos or carrying umbrellas, but we didn't really see the point.  Isn't a mud run supposed to be wet and messy?

Due to the obstacles, the runners were divided into 9 separate waves.  Jay was a wave (or 2 minutes) behind me at the starting gate.  His speed plus my difficulty on the first obstacle made it easy to catch up with me before the 2nd obstacle.

(That's me in the green shorts.)

The first was a series of 3 barrels about 3 feet high.  Not sure why, but I had difficulty getting over the first barrel.  It was slippery from the rain and as I tried to hop over I slid right back off.

Over and over and over again.

Until the Marine Corp dude watching over the obstacle came over and gave me a hand.  The second two barrels were the exact same as the first, yet I managed to make it over each of them on the first try.

A few feet after that were some logs about 2 feet off the ground that we were supposed to hop over.  Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Shortly afterward I heard someone yell 'Aaron Barone' and turned to find that my darling non runner, non training husband had already caught up to me.  He asked if I wanted him to stay with me.  I told him it would be more fun together, but I would drag his time down.

I secretly suspected he wanted to use me as an excuse if he didn't get the fast time he was hoping for.

The course wound around until we had to enter the lake for about 200 feet.  Jay and I enter locked arms and trudged through the water, passing a few racers along the way.  Then it was back on land for a muddy up hill climb.

As the course leveled off, we were greeted by more logs.  These were about 2 1/2 feet high and hovered over a lovely pit of mud.  We had to keep our feet moving, even when the competitors in front of us were at a stand still.  Otherwise the mud sucked our feet down, making it more difficult to move.  We marched in place awaiting our turn, but Jay's shoe was lost in the processed - suctioned off by the mud creature below us.

The brave knight battled the monster for the shoe - we had attached our timing chips (as instructed) to our laces, and the shoe in question meant the difference between Jay having an official time.

The Marine Corp recommended crawling hands and knees style and of course they were right.  It made battling the mud creature easier, although it wasn't without its own challenges.  As we quickly discovered, there was also gravel in the mud.  I'm not a big fan of pain and this was more than slightly uncomfortable.

Once we made it through that particular challenge, we were greeted by another.  A jungle net that we had to crawl under.  It was a slick mud surface, so most of us just slid under it like a slip 'n slide.

Shortly there after (and yes it felt like we were being bombarded by obstacles one right after another) there was a 3 foot hill of mud.  We climbed up it then slide down the other side.

Then it was back in the lake for another 50 foot walk and then we were back on pavement.  One thing I'll say write is that when obstacles are added into a 5K, it becomes difficult to know how far you've gone.  With the pavement under our feet, I thought we were nearing the end of the course.  Instead they just ran us around on the other side of the park.

We ran up and down hills until Jay asked to walk up some.  Finally his lack of training was catching up with him and it was me having to slack back for him.  Sorry.  I don't mean to gloat, but that rarely happens.  And while I love my husband it does give me a sense of satisfaction when he can't just rely on his athletic nature.

Then there was the 4 foot wall. 

The wall made me very thankful that we'd stuck together.

With a boost, I was up and over the wall quickly.  Something I wouldn't have been able to do on my own.

Then he jumped over, wishing he'd listen to me about shorts with a drawstring.

More mud, more hills, more Marines.

Our two final obstacles were the high knee tires and the low crawl ropes.  Once again we had to crawl through mud/gravel but this time under ropes about a foot and a half off the ground.

The last couple hundred yards took us downhill towards the finish.  There was traffic, and I could tell Jay was tired, so I really pored it on at the end.  This was my one and only shot to cross the finish line before him.

Only I didn't. But at least it was together, not him before me.  (Remember his 2 minute later start?)

We sought out my friend/training buddy who in her current pregnant state couldn't participate as more than our photographer, and got our celebratory picture made.  We'd survived!!

We headed back to the lake to rinse off before changing clothes and heading home.

Or so we thought.  What started as a grassy parking area became the 2nd muddy mess of the day.

We stuck around for a couple hours as Jay helped push people out of the mud.  Some had managed to get themselves so stuck no amount of Marine muscle was moving them.  Of course that's when the Jeep rode in to the rescue to tow them out.

My official race time ended up being 47:49 - as predicted my worst 5K ever.  Jay's time didn't register, so he carried his shoe the entire race for nothing!  Figuring a minute per obstacle (it was more on some - having to wait for others to clear out) and walking part of it to stay with my hubby, I figure that's not a bad time at all.

Don't worry, I washed and saved Aaron Barone so I'll have my hidden note of encouragement for next year.

Checking in - From Sunny South Carolina

Morning yall!

I was hoping my first blog on vaca would be about my mud run, but alas that is not the case.  Sorry to disappoint.  If you're friends of mine on facebook then you've already seen the photos, so all you're missing out on is my witty captions between them.

I figure you're not missing much so I post at my leisure.



Today starts a new challenge over at the Sisterhood.  I'm pretty sure its too late to sign up - its all complex with official weigh in submissions and teams and stuff.  The challenge for me?  Not participating.  You see I'm at a place where I need to focus on liking me.  And I can't do that if I weigh myself every week and get disgusted at my lack of progress.

Sure I've gained some weight this summer, but I wasn't happy with myself all the way down at 122, which tells me I gots to fix my head before I can even think about shedding these extra pounds.  (Last check I was back up to 131.)

My goals for now are finding the positives of my body and getting across that Anchor Splash finish line.  Which is in less than two weeks BTW.  Any suggestions, recommendations, checklists for seeing this thing through would be appreciated.

Okay so on to the check in.  I ran once and swam once on vacation.  According to Christie O's standards that officially makes me an athlete - exercising on vacation and not just because you feel like you have to, because I wanted to.

The other part - loving my body.

*Big sigh*

A few months ago The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans did a swimsuit giveaway courtesy of Lands End.  Never one to back down from an opportunity to get something free, I entered.  As many times as possible.  And I won.

Totally cool right?  Yeah until I came time to order.  Apparently the sizing at Lands End isn't compatible with the President of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee.  Their smallest size was still too big for my girls. 

Via Twitter, the Shrinking Jeans ladies recommended I use the live chat feature to speak with a Lands End rep about my issues.  Wouldn't ya know it but my rep was a man.

Me: Hi, I've got the smallest girls in the world, what can you do for me?
Lands End dude: We're clothing makers, not miracle workers.

Okay so that's not how it went.  He was helpful and recommended their Canvas line, which is geared more toward teens.  But the Shrinking Jeans ladies weren't sure those were included in the giveaway, so I picked 3 suits that had tie backs (the only 3 they offer under their regular line).

And all of those were out of stock.

But once again the reps were incredibly helpful (and never mocked me - to my face at least) and went ahead and sent a suit from the Canvas line - very similar to one I picked out on my own.

*Big gulp* so here I am - in all my bikini glory.  I must say that my husband is a bigger fan of the suit than I am, but hey if he approves of me showing this much skin who am I to argue.  I ask if he just wanted to share in on Facebook as a taunt.

*Said in best Borat voice* "You'll never get this!"

Of course we spent the rest of the day speaking like Borat.  I love my husband - I never have to worry about looking goofy in front of him.  He thought I was hot at the mud run, he thought I was hot on the beach in my new suit.  Okay so maybe not so hot speaking like Borat but definitely amusing and lovable.

So there you have it ladies - my own personal "Survivor" style challenge.  Posting a picture of myself in a bathing suit, instead of weeping when I see it.

Hopefully yall are having an excellent week.  Check back tomorrow - I hope to have my mud run post up by then.

Gifts of the Body Part 2

Now before you go looking for part 1, there isn't one.  At least on my blog any way.  I stumbled upon Faith, Fitness, Fun yesterday afternoon.  I was excited to read her 30 Days of Self love challenge and even more thrilled to see that she is a Christian. 

While faith in Jesus Christ isn't a requirement for the challenge (it doesn't even factor in if you don't want it to) it gave me the assurance that we wouldn't be getting into any self worship. Without Christ I am nothing.  Part of my self esteem issues come from leaving Him out of my life and trying to do things my own way.  My own way = superficial + shallow.

During this challenge she's encouraging us to...well I'll just let her tell you.

We need to shift the qualities with which we define them from aesthetic ones to purposeful ones. Hopefully, after completing 4 rounds of this exercise and having to come up with 12 different parts of ourselves we recognize as a gift, we will grow to love our bodies more and more.

I'm going to give it a try.  I'm not going to be able to get all the rounds in.  Or maybe I'll just spill over into October.

Here goes.

1) My hands/fingers.

I love to read.  Nothing says comfort to my brain like the pages of a warn out old paperback in my hands.  Or the soft leather of my NIV Study Bible, as I turn the thin pages with my fingers.  I need my fingers and hands for all the list making I do.  As well as my blogging.

Not to mention is the perfect perch for my ultimate bling:

If you're new to my blog, please know that the day I said "I do" I got another ring to stack behind that one - complete with 10 more small diamonds.  My husband use to be a Larry Byrd fan and was redneck sweet enough to want me to have 33 diamonds - Byrds jersey number.

2) My arms

These arms are made for hugging.  I'm not sure who gives better hugs, my niece or husband.  Nothing makes me feel more loved then when they wrap their arms around me.  The picture above is a tame hug on her part.  I'd just ran 13.1 miles in 2 hours and 44 minutes.  I was exhausted and wouldn't have been able to hold her had she jumped in my arms like she normally does.

3) My Feet

These feet have carried me lots of miles.  Of course the 13.1 mentioned above.  Plus a 26.2 mile walk.  And countless hikes in the Great Smoky Mountains National Park.

Sure my grandmother sees my long, skinny feat and sees nothing but problems.  I've inherited her feet and she just recently had to undergo foot surgery.  She swears its that they are too skinny to handle all the pressure of carrying her body.   I doubt that's a doctor's diagnosis.  All I can say for sure is that for the past 30 years these feet have served me well.  I pray that they'll continue to do so for the next 50-60 year

4) My Lips

I think from the picture its obvious, I'm a lady who knows how to take charge.  It was I that took the lead and kissed him when he was too shy.  (3 dates ladies - I had to wait until the end of date 3.  And who knows how long it would have taken had I left it up to him!)

I've come to realize in the past few months that my spirtual gift is encouragement.  Sometimes it comes in the forms of the words I say.  Other times its the words I type to my efriends.  (See #1)

I hope you take a moment to reflect on yourself - think about how well your body has served you all these years.  Rejoce!  Try to love the woman in the mirror just a little more each day.

"Hi pot, its the kettle here."

Trust me, I'm working on it!