Here's my $15 copay

Now that I've paid you as my therapist, you have to listen. :P

I am the most insecure person in the world. scratch that.

I am the 2nd most insecure person in the world.

Let’s be realistic here, surely I can’t be the worst.

Can I?

I try to let me frugal freak banner fly high, but that’s not who I really am.

I’m the girl who saves every penny, so that one day she can afford that she’s always wanted. Only by the time the pennies add up, the dream changes and I need more pennies.

So being made fun of for watching network channels on an old 26 inch TV really does get to me.

Have I mentioned how much I hate the way I look?

I’ve been working out more and watching what I eat since the first of the year and the scale just isn’t budging. You’d think cutting back from 3-5 days of fast food for lunch down to 1 would do the trick, but it hasn’t. Neither has cutting in half the number of cokes I drink in a day (from 2 down to 1, sometimes none).

Then there is Sunday school. To be honest I’m starting to understand why Mr. Right doesn’t like it at the big church. I think having a community of people who are in our age group/place in life is important. But every Sunday feels like middle school. Will there be anyone talk to me? Will I fit in okay?

I don’t take criticism well. Mostly because I see it as validation that I really am that pathetic. Incompetent. Socially inept.

And while I’ve picked at Mr. Right before in social situations, I realized this weekend its just not appropriate. Being called a name, even when its all just for a laugh, really isn’t worth it.

I know he just did it because he assumed that its okay – why wouldn’t it be, I do it all the time. But it still hurt.

Sorry for the serious crap, just had to get it off my chest.

I promise a donkey picture for wordless Wednesday tomorrow.