Mantra Monday - In the Footsteps of a Remarkable Man

My heart still aches despite everything in my head telling me to get over it - its just a silly little race after all.  My head keeps telling me how proud I should be of him. And I am. Deep down under the hurt and self doubt. The awe at my remarkable husband is there.


 
 
When he was little, he chronically got injured.  Every picture his mother has shown me of him as a little feller he has a big red bump on his head.  He would fall into the fireplace or something and get a giant knot.  The knot took forever to go away.  At one point the doctors thought it was a clot or a tumor - surgery to remove it would be necessary.
 
I thank God (literally - I don't say that casually) that he was tested and diagnosed with hemophilia before the surgery ever occurred.  Thankfully we only have to guess if he would have made it through the operation - cutting open someone with a blood condition, especially an undiagnosed blood condition, could be fatal.
 
His mother has told me that in the days that followed, she forced him to sit on the couch and do nothing - her fear of him being injured was to great to allow him to live life.  She sat opposite of him on the couch, crying and eating her favorite comfort foods.  How could they possibly make it through this?
 
The hard times for him came when he was in middle/high school.  His natural athleticism drove him to competitive sports, but he couldn't find a doctor to sign his medical release form.  There would be no football, basketball, or baseball in his future.  If he wanted to compete, they'd only allow him to join the swim team.
 
In college, he finally talked them into allowing him to compete in crew - some yuppy rowing sport - surely he couldn't injure himself too badly sitting in a boat rowing? 
 
Only he did.  The yuppy in him calls it his iliopsoas, we regular folks just call it a hip flexor.  Not one to whine or complain, he never brought it up.  His mom, however, told me of all the painful rehab they did to aid in healing and range of motion.
 
As with any injury, scar tissue can build.  They were told that he'd probably walk with a limp for the rest of his life.
 
Stop and think about that for a moment.
 
He's supposed to be walking with a limp right now.  A decade ago a doctor told him his gate would forever be marred by this injury.
 
My husband is a walking miracle.  Quite literally.
 
There is no reason he should have been able to finish a sub 30 5K, much less the difficult 26.2 mile trek we completed Saturday.
 
Life hasn't been fair to my husband.  He has blood condition that's supposed to be hereditary, yet no one in his family has it.  He's a product of a genetic mutation. 
 
He shouldn't be walking with ease, much less competing in marathons.
 
He shouldn't be able to beat me in a race of any distance, but he does.  Every time.  Except that time he had to poop and had to walk for 2 miles of the race.
 
He could have went into a bubble upon diagnosis, but didn't.

He has every reason to not get out there and live life, after all life will eventually kill ya.
 
Yet he refuses.  "Don't tell me what I can't do!"   A popular quote from the TV show Lost, but the mantra my sky-diving husband lives by. 
 
When life knocks him down, tries to dictate his course - he spits in its face and pushes the obstacle out of his way. 
 
My lack of athleticism isn't fair, but it only wins if I give in.  If I succumb to the temptation to sit on the couch and eat Cheetos.  Damn my lack of athleticism AND the horse it road in on.  I'm going to prove to myself that I'm better than this.
 
I'm going to train these next few week (after the blisters allow me to wear trainers again) with all my heart so that I can shoot for a new 5K PR on May 7th.
 
Then I'm going to hop in the pool and on my antique mountain bike to prove that I can conquer the hills of West Knoxville, crappy bike or no.
 
After that I'll race in two half marathons in back to back months.  Come winter, I'll start my marathon training.  Because the only way to conquer fear is to look it straight in the face.  Training on the hills of Gatlinburg will prepare for the brutal Knoxville Marathon.
 
I refuse to let fear tell me what I can't do.  I refuse to let it limit me. 
 
I refuse to allow myself to believe the lie that I'm not good enough.  If this race has taught me anything its that hard work and determination can take you far - especially when you have someone taunting you telling you that you can't do it.  Be it a wife or that hateful voice inside your head.
 

Financial...erm...scratch that...Fitness Friday

In my head, there is a battle. 

To iPhone or not to iPhone.

If I did, I would choose the $50 out of date iPhone3.  So what's the big deal?  The $25 a month extra for a data plan terrifies me.  Sure its not a lot on a monthly basis, but I hate the idea of being tied down to charges each month.  That's over $300 a year (over half our monthly mortgage payment) to have Internet on my phone.

The reason this isn't going to be a financial Friday post where I ask for your advice is that I already know what you're going to say.  You'll tell me to go for it.  That its no big deal.  We've got the money might as well enjoy it.  Welcome to 2010!

(Yes I realize its 2011, but I'm only getting the phone for $50 because its soooooo last year!)

You'll all tell me to go for it.  Well everyone but Live Simply - Live Well.  She'll tell me to run far, far away - clutching my 2005 Razr tightly.

So instead, I'm going to tell you about how (and why) I spent $150 today to prove that I'm better than my husband.

Last year I was involved in the Mountain Man Memorial March.  A friend's husband was serving in Iraq and she wanted to form a team to walk in honor of him.  We started training in January for this even, doing long walks every other weekend. 

My darling husband made fun every step of the way.  Sure its 26.2 miles, but its just walking.  Why do you need to train for that?  You could do it tomorrow and be just fine.

What he failed to realize was that it wasn't just a marathon walk.  It was, as the name suggested, more of a march...a hike.  Military types traveled to G-burg in order to  participate in this even.  Most wore 40 pound packs and were dressed in full military gear.

This event isn't "just" anything.

So at the end of last year as he was massaging my tired little tootsies, he made a bold move.  My husband challenged me to a race.  He & I would both compete, but this time as individuals, racing against each other. 

If he wins, he gets 300 points.  Sorta like a token at Chuck E. Cheese.  Not really worth anything until you get enough. 

The system is fairly complicated, but if we ever get to +300 I get to go on a $300 shopping spree.  If we ever get to -300 points, he gets a TV in the bedroom.  There are various things that can earn points, but this will be the single largest batch of points awarded.

He currently needs over 400 points to get his TV.  On the other hand, I only need 150 or so before I hit my shopping spreed.  Winning this event will be the equivalent of putting cash in my hand.  He's that confident that he - a couch potato who thinks 5K is a "long run" - can beat me.

I've given him a 0.6% chance of winning.  I'm that confident, although as it approaches my confidence is waning. 

Since I'm a list person, let's break out the bullet points to see in who's favor the odds lie.

Reasons he could beat me:

• He's legs are longer than mine.
• He's got stronger quads for climbing those steep inclines.
• He's determined.
• He always is faster than me running, even with zero training.
• He's a man, and sometimes they just suck like that.

Reasons I will win:

• I've completed the 26.2 mile distance twice: once in the march last year, and once running the Disney marathon.
• I've been training.
• He thinks 5K is a long run and gets bored easily.
• I've study nutrition needs for endurance running & walking.  I know what and how much I need to put in my back pack for what will probably be a 7-8 hour jaunt.
• I have already told him that I'm not packing snacks for him like I typically do on hikes.  He's on his own.
• I have good shoes that are broken in.  His shoes are worn out and cause blisters. (& he's too cheap to buy new ones.)
• The most distance he's ever covered was on this hike with breaks along the way, including completely stopping for lunch at the top.  Yes he did better than me.  Yes I wanted to stab him along the way, but I was probably anemic at the time.
• He's a mutant.  The chances of him pulling a muscle that hasn't been exercised in over a month is great.  Cold of me to say, but over and over I've begged him to train for this.  Then I asked him to call it off because he hasn't trained.  I've done my part and am washing my hands of it.  Until of course its time to drive him to the hematologist.

Now the countdown begins.  In 4 weeks we'll know the answer to the question that's burning in every one's mind - who's the better endurance athlete in the Mutant family!

Power of One Check in

Challenge start: 137
Last week: 136.2
This week: 137.8

Oops, forgot to take my Walt Disney World Marathon medal off!

This week: 137.2.

I gained a pound this week.  Boo freakin hoo.  I also ran 26.2 miles on Sunday.  Add to that my eating was thrown off by the travel to and from Florida.  And the ramen noodles I made last night when I was too lazy to cook a real dinner.  I'm not at all concerned about the gain. 

Now that I'm done with the training causing me to burn a million calories a week (and making me hungry enough to consume 2 million calories a week) I'm going to just try to make sensible choices and see where that takes me.

Check out my race report.  I split it up in 3 sections, but they all connect back into one another.  Thanks again for all your support leading up to and after the race!!  A special thanks to Audrey for waving those pom-pons for us at the finish line! and to Bari for chatting with me through the half way point.

Walt Disney World Marathon - Race Report Part 3

Click on the links for parts one and two.  Please and thank you.

In part 2, I forgot to mention the helpful dude at the water station.  My water bottle holds enough for bout 13-15 miles, depending on how thirsty I get.  I mix my own Gatorade, and knew that what they passed out at the aid stations would be too strong for me.  Instead I packed a zip lock baggy full of just the right amount of powered, and would refill the bottle when the time came.

I stopped just to the side of the water station, and crouched down.  A volunteer offered me a cup of PowerAde that I declined.  I explained I was refilling my bottle and would need water to mix with the powdered.  I just wanted to stop before getting to the water so I didn't hold anyone up.  Before I could get my baggy out and the end bit off (to make a funnel w/the corner), he had grabbed a bottle of water and came to where I was crouched.  He even held the bottle for me while I pushed in the rest of the powder.

I can't say enough how helpful and kind the Disney staff as well as the volunteers were.  They went above and beyond to make the race experience as good as possible.

Okay where were we?  Mile 22 ish?  After talking to my sister one last time, I told her to let my brother-in-law know I'd seen Caballo Blanco (Born to Run anyone?) and told her I should be good to the end.  The race had previously been through the sewer plant Animal Kingdom, and would take us through Hollywood Studios before finishing at Epcot.

I can't recall which came first, the chocolate or Hollywood studios, but remembering my energy when I passed the "American Idol" camera I can only guess that the chocolate came first.  I was going to pass up the chocolate, but then I saw they had Mr. Goodbar.  I can't pass a Mr. Goodbar up.

They had a camera set up in their American Idol section asking us to wave/yell for the camera.  Apparently my "woot" was a little too enthusiastic, because as I passed the guy said "that girl needs to run another marathon."

I had a hard time getting in my zone throughout the race.  I was surrounded by people yet I was still alone.  I didn't see Jay at any of the spectator spots, and I couldn't jam to my music because their speakers were turned up so loud.  I was thankful that the final miles were filled with cheering people, even if they weren't there specifically for me.

In the last 2 miles, I noticed Sleeping Beauty - my nieces favorite princess.  Even though I was ready to have the race done, I knew I had to stop for a few moments for a photo.  Thankfully she didn't have a line and I didn't lose any momentum. 

I almost cried when I saw the legless spectator along the side of the course.  I wondered what he was thinking.  I remembered what Mel had told me about how fortunate these legs of mine would allow me to run.  I tried to decide if he consider his own misfortune, if he wondered why we were destroying our legs, if he was glad we appreciated our legs.

Probably none of the above, but hey it was near the end of the race and I was emotional.  I tend to over think things any way.

I saw the 25 mile marker, and picked up my pace a bit.  I saw the 26 mile marker and picked it up a bit more.  I saw the finish line and tried to pick it up but there was nothing left.  As I crossed the finish line I raised my hands in victory.

I was a marathoner.

I am a marathoner.

I am now in the 1/10 of 1% of the population that can claim that title.

Walt Disney World Marathon - Race Report Part 2

For the first part of the race click here.  Although I got a little ahead of my self.  Let me jump back a couple miles before my mother called.

As I said, I felt the call of nature while sitting in the coral, but when I got my first porta-potty opportunity it was evident that I wasn't the only one.  At about the mile and a half mark, there were a dozen or so toilets, but there was also a line.  Figuring that I'd held it that long, I could wait a while longer. 

My patience paid off, as we ran through Epcot (mile 3ish) and there were some real, non-portable toilets open for runners to use.  I even got to wash my hands in a real sink!

Okay so around mile 5 or 6 my parents called to check in.   Along the way we had marching bands encouraging us, as well as Disney workers (through Epcot) cheering us on.  Personally I'd be pissed if some stupid runner made me have to go into work at 4AM, but they were very good spirited about it.

Bari, called me near the Magic Kingdom section and chatted with me for a bit.   My legs were still cold, even though I'd been racing for 2 hours or so, but to that point it was my only complaint.  As I approached Cinderella's castle, I asked her to call me back in 30 minutes.  I stopped (because I don't know the settings on my camera well enough to get a good "in motion" shot) and took a picture of the castle.

I was disappointed that my favorite princess wasn't around her home, but I was glad that race photographers and Disney staff were there to take pictures of racers in front of the castle.  I got in the short-ish line and posed a couple times.

While in the Magic Kingdom I also had my picture taken with the Little Man's favorite character, Buzz Lightyear.  LM says "to infity an yond."

The highway sections of the race weren't nearly as interesting.  In fact, the hardest part of the race for me was between miles 17-20.  My sister had called me a couple times after the Magic Kingdom and I confessed to her that I was starting to get discouraged.  My pace was off what I was hoping for. 

She, BIL, the Princess, and the LM all spoke to me on the phone to help me along the way.  The Princess was disinterested in the run, but the Disney talk had her wanting to play Princess so she dressed her baby brother up in feather trimmed shoes and a lipstick.

Around mile 19, I saw a couple in front of me hold hands.  "Aww, how sweet.  They are doing the race together."  The closer I got it, I noticed that the woman had on wings and a pink tutu.  It was Christie O and hubby.  I snapped a picture of them (hopefully it turned out well) and continued on.

They caught up with me around mile 20 and we crossed over the check point within a few seconds of one another.  :Leading up to the race miles 20.1 through 26.2 had me worried.  Instead of being scared as I tackled them, they made me confident.  With each step, I knew I was traveling further and further still than I ever had before.

Right before the 21 mile marker, Viva Las Vegas came on my IPod.  I had chosen that song because its one of our favorites to compete on the Wii "Just Dance 2" game.  It made me smile thinking about how much fun we had playing that game (and me winning consistently) over Christmas.  It pepped me up and I had to break out the finger guns.  (Those of you who've played will understand why.)

Earlier in the day, I overheard someone say "oh...she's on the phone" as if they thought I was crazy and talking to myself.  Those crazy confirmations were really confirmed when i was shooting my pistols instead of hitting reported wall.

Also around miles 21-22?  My ass started hurting.  More specifically my tail bone.  I debated in my head the merits of stopping, sitting down, and cracking my back, or just continuing on.  The fear, of course, was that after sitting I wouldn't be able to stand.  I chose to risk it, not thinking I could bear the discomfort for the rest of the race.

TO BE CONTINUED
(Click here to continue to part 3)

Walt Disney World Marathon - Race Report

The whole Disney experience was great: meeting for the first time IRL some awesome chicas, experiencing the "magic of Disney", and getting away from the cold weather/snow storm back home for a weekend.

But those are all things to talk about in a different blog.

The race.

I was very glad to have those awesome chicas (and chicos) around me race morning.  Christie O. had heard the day before about people missing the buses to the race because they stopped running at the 4AM cut off time (not that they arrived late, they just stopped running at 4 despite the line).

Kirsten decided to set the alarm for 2:30 to try and catch the bus around 3ish.  We'd packed our bags to check the night before and laid out or race gear.  The only morning of prep work that remained was popping an English Muffin in the toaster and getting dressed.

As we were walking to the main building, I noticed a couple ladies carrying their refillable Disney mugs back to their rooms.   Which (thankfully) triggered in my mind that I'd forgotten my hand held water bottle.  It was the only thing not with the rest of my stuff (I'd left it filled and in the cooler overnight).

A bit flustered, I headed back to our building and got on the elevator with a fellow racer.  I got off when the doors opened and went to room --08.  Banging on the door (we'd left all our keys with Jay) I waited to be  let in.  Then I noticed there was a "privacy please" sign on the door.

Only I was the last person out.

And I hadn't put the sign on the door.

Looking over I noticed I was at 4608 instead of 4508. 

I had just banged on the wrong door.

Before anyone came to the door I took off in a run.  Thankfully I made it around the corner before seeing if they answered the knock.  I felt bad, until later when Kirsten informed me of their loud activities had been obnoxious the night before.  Guess I was tired because while Tim and Jay confirmed that they were really loud.  I hadn't heard anything.

Loading the bus was thankfully drama free.  We were off to the starting gates.  Here was where I was thankful to have my Shrinking Jeans hookers around me (plus Christie O's friend Nicole and Mr. Christie O. and Mr. Kirsten.)  We arrived early, but it just took a few potty breaks to eat up that time and we were off to the corals.

Seemed that there was a porta-potty on every turn.  Except in the coral.  So guess where the urge hit me?  While I'm not above peeing in a bush, there are just some things a girl needs a proper bathroom for.

Also?  It was a COLD morning.  Maybe not by Tennessee in January standards, but by I'm-in-Florida-dressed-in-shorts-and-a-thin-long-sleeved-shirt standards.  When I went to sit down in the coral (I was going to be there waiting for our start for an hour), my legs were so cold and stiff my skin hurt.

I had dressed in a tank, with a thin zip pullover, and a pair of shorts for the promised 70 degree weather.  I was under dressed for sitting around in the cool morning air.  Once the first runners started, the excitement really started.  In less than 30 minutes I'd take my official first steps of the journey I'd been anticipating for the past year.

I was glad to have Christie O. and her Mr. in my coral, it really helped with the wait.  I knew that once we crossed the start line we'd be running our own race.  I was use to running alone.  I'd never practiced sitting in a coral for an hour by myself.

By the time my first scheduled incoming phone call came in, the sun was up, but I was still freezing.  My mom and dad called with their words of support and encouragement before they headed to church.  As I ran through one of the mile markers, my mom asked what all that racket was. 

That racket, was the sound system that the race officials had set up to play music at intervals along the way.  Later in the race, that racket would mess up my race mojo.


TO BE CONTINUED
(Click Here to continue to part 2)

(I don't want to bore you to tears.  We'll be in the park soon I promise.)