Each day, my church sends out a devotional message to anyone in the congregation who has signed up for it. These were the words to follow the scripture from Proverbs:
The decisions you make today may not seem as weighty as those of a president, but remember that every choice you make has eternal consequences.
I, as the wife of a non-believer, need to realize that more than anyone. When our pastor council us before the marriage, he spoke with my husband and gave him some reading material (More than a Carpenter by Josh McDowell) that might answer any questions he might have about Jesus.
When he came to the end of the book, Mr. Right commented on how perfect that book was in addressing any questions that he had. (Please pray for him as he continues to seek God).
One thing stuck out in his mind though, the author noted that upon his conversion he no longer struggled with sadness and anger. His new life in Jesus meant a new attitude in Christ. And that made my husband worry about me.
He has seen firsthand my ungodly temper, and experiences on too regular a basis that random sadness that I can’t pin down, but just can’t shake.
I tried explaining that God doesn’t magically fix you – but He will help you work through things like that. Instead of seeking His help on those matters, I’ve attempted to go it alone. I explained that the author of the book, once convinced that Jesus truly is the only way, was probably on fire for Christ.
I, on the other hand, am a lukewarm believer that we’re warned about in the New Testament.
There are a few things I need to do (and am working toward):
• Listen to Christian radio.
The local station did Christmas music for the entire month of December, then at the end of the month issued a 30 day challenge. Listen for the entire month of January to witness the positive impact on your life. I took them up on this challenge. In the car driving to and from work the only stations I listen to are the Christian station and the talk radio station (only when Dave Ramsey’s on).
• Pray more.
This was actually one of his suggestions. We sat down to dinner the other night and he asked why we didn’t bless the food. I’m more lax on this when we eat while watching TV. This is the perfect opportunity to ask God to bless my marriage.
• Be more observant about what we watch on TV.
Eat at the dinner table, not on the couch while watching Family Guy. I’ve admitted before – I love that show. Quite frankly I sometimes worry if God’s gonna strike me down as I’m watching it. Is it funny enough to risk my husband’s salvation? Certainly not.
• No more potty mouth.
I actually remember in 7th grade saying my first cuss word. I thought it was clever and funny. If I told you know how hard I worked to get it in casual conversation you would be dumbfounded. The pastor’s message this past week was from James, and talked about how salt water and fresh water couldn’t come from the same source – I can’t bless my God with the same mouth I utter curses with. And it certainly won’t translate into a blessing for my husband.
• Bible study
This is something I seriously slack on. Honestly, its exhausting. I’m not talking about pulling my Bible open to the passage as directed by my quarterly devotional literature. What I’m referring to is going into our bedroom together, pulling out the word of God and reading it as a couple. We typically read several chapters and spend at least an hour discussing questions he might have. I have a time where my non-believing husband wants to learn from the Bible, asks and gets answers to real, honest questions about Jesus and his life/ministry here on Earth. Instead of embracing that time, I don’t do it nearly enough.
If I did all those things, I firmly believe that the change would be revolutionary. So what’s holding me back?