February 16, 2009

Mr. Right meets Athena

I was nervous talking to Mr. Right after our first kiss, especially since I suspected I had rushed things a bit. The kiss date (our 3rd) was on Tuesday the 24th of October—Mr. Right’s birthday. I thought it was a good sign that he wanted to spend his birthday with me, but I was still worried that the kiss at the end of the night had been a bit aggressive on my part.

All my fears were put to rest when Mr. Right expressed interest in going out again that weekend. I definitely wanted to see him again, but my schedule was a little tight.

That Friday night I had a KFW wrestling show and the following morning I was heading to Green Bay to see the Packers take on the Arizona Cardinals at Lambeau field. When I told Mr. Right, his reaction surprised me. Not only was he not weirded out that I was involved in a local wrestling organization, but he volunteered to come watch.

Athena-my wrestling character-is a snob. Her main purpose is to talk down to the audience, insulting them as much as possible. On top of that, her wardrobe is a little more risqué than I would wear. I worried that Mr. Right didn’t know what he was getting in to and that he would think badly of me.

He seemed to think it would be fun, so I sucked it up and gave him directions to the Dance Barn (home to most of the KFW shows). He sent me a text message when he got there and I met him out in the parking lot. He was so impressed with the night’s events that he wrote his first (and only) myspace blog about it.

When he told me later that he was going to blog about it, I was very curious as to how he would refer to me. He couldn’t exactly call me his girlfriend, since we weren’t an official couple. Would he use the dreaded f word and call me his ‘friend’? Would he refer to me as a girl that he’d been dating? Actually he played it safe and just called me by my names (Brooke & Athena).

The show was eventful to say the least. I felt bad for leaving him on his own, but Athena had duties she had to attend to, mainly preparing the tongue-lashing she was about to unleash on the crowd. Thankfully, Athena’s duties were over with fairly early in the night, so I put on my fleece jacket and headed downstairs to enjoy my date.

The big attraction for the night was a flaming tables match. The rules state that the first person to set a table on fire and put his opponent through it wins. This type matched had been successfully attempted previously in the KFW, so it was considered old hat.

Only the person buying the lighter fluid chose charcoal lighter fluid instead of cigarette lighter fluid. No matter how hard they tried or how much fluid they doused on the table, they couldn’t get it to light. It seemed as if everyone in the building (fans included) made an attempt to set the table on fire to no avail.

Until some genius in the crowd decided to light a napkin on fire and tossed it onto the table. That was all it took and the flames leaped to the ceiling. Thankfully the KFW security had the fire extinguishers and put out the flames before the whole building caught on fire.

Mr. Right and I sat there as the cloud from the fire extinguisher came closer and closer to us. I assumed it would just be like a cloud of smoke that would pass by us, smell nasty, and then go away. The cloud made the air so thick it was impossible to breathe; I felt like I was suffocating.

I covered my mouth with my fleece jacket, hopped over the railing, and high tailed it out the door. A band had played earlier in the night before the first bell had sounded, and they had stuck around so we got a mini-front porch concert. Surprisingly, once the smoke cleared, we headed back in for the main event.

After it was finally over, he walked me to my car where we chatted for a little bit. Then it finally happened: he went in for a kiss. Unlike our first kiss, this one wasn’t rushed. He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine, then pulled back only slightly. With his arms still around me, we said our goodbyes, and then he kissed me again. I got into my car and headed home with butterflies floating around in my stomach.

Just a few days after the event, he summarized it by writing the following:


After worrying I wouldnt be able to find the place, I arrived without a hitch thanks to terrific directions from Brooke! "Go 5 miles past the High School and look for the big barn before the fillin station" - Ok, so maybe she didn't say "fillin' station", but you get the point! First mission accomplished! The atmosphere of the place was great - a bar in a barn with a honky-tonk band playing and dance floor...what more could you ask for!!! I was accompanied by Brooke (aka Athena Goddess and referred to as such from here on out!).


I knew I was in for a treat when the house band played Steve Holy's "Brand New Girlfriend" and wrestling began to the introduction song of "Welcome to the Jungle" (WHO DEY!! I love my Cincinnati Bengals!). Let the wrestling begin!!! It began with the World Champion (thanks to Athena for clarifying the varying titles) Overkill talking smack about taking away the belt! After a match, I realized wrestling was not my "cup of tea" - but just as I was beginning to get a bit antsy, the real reason why I ventured to Triple C took the stage - Athena the Goddess of the KFW.


Looking gorgeous and wearing her ever so fitting crown, she put the wrestlers in their place, telling them they were missing one crucial ingredient in order for them to have the opportunity to fight for the World Championship Belt - RESPECT! Said in a true lady like fashion (while sounds of fans yelling to "Smack the B*tch" filled the background!) she laid down the law and made clear who is the boss...Athena...the General Manager of the KFW! Now that the wrestling had subsided and Athena was the center of attention, I was able to smile, laugh, and get involved in what the heck was going on again!


A couple matches followed - and with the expertise of Athena, I was informed the move one of the wrestlers did I liked was called the "Figure 4". I also learned when the referree counts past three when they are doing something illegal it does not mean the match is over!! Here I was thinking the match had ended because "Nasty Nate" had counted past 3 - it was a good thing Athena was there by my side or I'd have looked like a complete blithering idiot - instead it was only partial idiocy!


The next match was set...I was informed it was going to be a "flaming table" bout. The first to get tossed through a table engulfed in flames was the loser of the match. I thought to myself...now here comes the real excitement! Son...I didnt even know the half of it.


Initially, they had a difficult time setting the table (apparently flame resistant) on fire - lighter fluid/kerosene was doused all over the table and people tried lighting it with lighters to no avail. About 30 seconds passed and random fans came to the rescue placing their lighters on the table as well. Still, no fire....just as I was beginning to lose hope and there would be no fire show someone placed some paper on the table.


Goodness, that did the trick! Before you could do a tap out count there were blazing flames up to the ceiling - from my vantage point, I could feel the immense heat from what was supposed to be a "little fire" that had grown out of control (haha...perhaps it was the whole frickin can of lighter fluid they drenched the table with!!). Luckily, there were fire extinguishers on hand and were deployed quickly.


The "smart" people in the crowd left the scene as soon as it was released - they herded through the pickett rails in order, but with a sense of urgency. I was still sitting, taking in the moment with half amusement and half "what the h*ll do I do now" when the smoke from the extinguisher came tumbling in like a mini ploom from the 9/11 disaster.


Before I knew it Athena and I were engulfed in the smoke/extinguisher clouds. It was time to do something....and fast! We pulled the neck of our shirts over our face and Athena did a "Lambeau Leap" over the railing and I quickly followed, heading for the doors and fresh air. The leap was quite ironic because just a couple minutes prior Athena had snuck up behind me next to the railing and scared the bejesus outta me by flopping my hoodie over my head. I urged her to hop over the fence and join me - she said that was not very "lady like"...Haha...Lady like gets thrown out the door when fire, smoke, and that distinct taste of extinguisher are involved!:-)


It was definitely a good time for an intermission! Everyone gathered outside on the porch and the band did some accoustic pickin of some Toby Keith's "A little less talk, a lot more action" - with a quick wit the guy did a slight variance to the song singing "A lot more talk a little less smokin action"! The very odd taste of the extinguisher was still lingering, so I hoofed it over to the Jeep and picked up my handy Orange Powerade! After I thoroughly enjoyed seeing a little kid (about 1.5 or 2 years old) decked out in a cowboy hat and boots dancing on the porch, the wrestling action was about to reconvene.


But before the wrestling was to begin, Athena had some business to take care of (sorry to embarrass you, but this was darn near the cutest thing ever!). We were standing on the porch and somewhat out of the blue she says in a quiet, innocent voice "I need you to turn your back to me and close your eyes" (or something to that effect).

Surprised, initially I did not know what was going on! She didnt tell me "earmuffs" or I probably would not have been able to decipher the sound of her hawking a big loogie off the deck and into the parking lot (ok, so that was a MAJOR exaggeration, it was more like a tiny little spit!).

Regardless, it was definitely adorable (not the act itself, but the shyness associated with it...oh and the act wasnt too bad either...) I figure she probably got some pretty good distance despite the nasty prevailing winds whipping around the area!


Apparently the Triple C Barn owners tightened the leash a little after the fire incident and some of the stunts (such as the flourescent light bulb being smashed over a guy's head!) were nixed! The other wrestling matches were a bit of a blur, except the long awaited "Casket Match" which featured the fight for the World Championship Belt. After a long and exciting battle, Overkill retained his belt and title.


Whew...I had survived my first KFW Experience! Although the wrestling action was without question very thought out, athletic, and somewhat entertaining, I have decided I'm not getting into the ring anytime soon and will not be one of the most avid fans in attendence. Talk about some hardcore fans - at the end one of the wrestler's girlfriends was struck in the back of the head by a rabbid fan! I had to ask if it was "part of the show" - but apparently not, just a honky-tonk cheap shot from an overzealous fan...I reckon!


Will I go back and watch the KFW again? Certainly, as long as Athena accompanies me...preferably we won't be engulfed in flames again! My shoes are still white from the extinguisher!


All things considered, a great night! Athena shined on the stage and was definitely the bright spot of the show as she exemplified her grace & elegance each time she took the stage (even while there were 50 something year old intoxicated women desperately urging the Wrestler's to "smack the bitch" while she was talking smack!)

3 comments:

  1. What an exciting night. Glad it ended the way it did!

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  2. Oh my gosh, I might have been rolling from laughing! Awesome story!

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  3. What a night! It's fun that you have his blog post - love that he wrote you were the "bright spot of the show as she exemplified her grace & elegance each time she took the stage." Waiting for the next chapter. Are you having fun writing your story?

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